It’s 4 am. It’s my turn to do the night shift as Ari stood guard the night before. B”H my night was uneventful, other than Benny waking up out of sedation once and being disoriented until the medicine kicked in again, he was calm. The nurses were in every hour or two doing there thing, but for the most part B”H boring. Ari on the other hand had a more frightening experience. Being there was such a significant delay in administering the infusion on Tuesday, the procedure was completed by late evening. After about 9 hours of trying to figure out medications to sedate Benny to get the treatment in a safe manner the doctors and nurses were successful. Then about 2 hours after the infusion was complete, Benny awakened once more. At that point he was radioactive which complicated matters. Ari had no choice but to hold him so that he wouldn’t pull out any of the lines that were hooked up to him. During the briefing that we received about precautions of what to do and what not, holding him was something not to do. However, that being said, the alternative could Chas Veshalom (G-D Forbid) been much worse.
During the training of how to care for Benny, we were told by nuclear medicine specialists that if we were to wear special glasses, we could see a bright light coming out of Benny and around his bed. That brings me to my next thought. Instead of thinking of the light as scary, I envision the light coming from Hashem (G-D). During this month we are told that Hashem comes down from the Heavens to be extra close to us. How appropriate and lucky we are to have this treatment take place during this auspicious time.
The following is an excerpt from Rabbanit Yemima Mizrachi:
Elul – 12times more powerful
Basically, 5772 ‐ תשע”ב ‐has left us drained.
And Elul? It comes to give you strength! The word is made up of the smaller words לו אל –it has power.
Hashem is standing over you and calling to you: בן בתחנונים קרא קום נרדם? לך מה אדם, ‐Human, why are you sleeping? Get up and call out in pleading. 1Get up, Neshama, get up. I’m sending a million powers into you. Wake up you sleepers from your slumber; slumberers, rouse yourselves! This month comes to give you tremendous energy.
(Maybe this is why Benny has so much power to fight the vast amounts of sedation that are constantly given to him. He doesn’t want to sleep and waste a minute. Another truly amazing thing to witness, no matter how draining it is!)
The Brisker Rav says: ה’ בטוב לראות האמנתי לולא‐ Had I not believed I’d see the goodness of Hashem –the first word of the verse is Elul in reverse. The whole month, walk around saying, לראותהאמנתי ה’ בטוב לראות האמנתי ה’. בטוב ‐“I believe I will see Hashem’s goodness. I believe I will see Hashem’s goodness. I believe Hashem is sending only good my way.” 2Say that –and you’ll see and feel yourself filling with power.
Every day of Elul we recite Psalm :27 ‐Hashem is my light and salvation –so whom should I fear? Hashem is the stronghold of my life –of whom shall I be afraid?
Although, we don’t have the goggles to see the physical light permeating out of Benny, it is not difficult to feel it and know that it is BE”H the light of Hashem combined with the light coming from all of you thru your Tefillos (Prayers) and good deeds. We have to believe in goodness and Hashem will send it our way.
I am eagerly awaiting for Patrick from nuclear medicine to come measure the levels of light in the room and break the records today. We are aiming for a level of at least 7, but would love “2”. 2 is Beis, Binyomin starts with Beis, 2 is a partnership. The partnership between Man and G-D. We look forward to caressing Benny once again very soon. Hopefully BE”H today.
Let the light of Hashem, bring the Refuah that Binyomin Chaim Ben Faigie Sarah needs along with all the needs of Klal Yisroel. May we all be Zoche to see the lights of the Holy Bais Hamikdash shine throughout the world during this holy month of Elul.
When you recite Psalm 27 “L Dovid Hashem” today, please remember the power and strength of this Great Light. Benny was Zoche to experience it and so may each and every one of us.
To read more inspiring words of Rebetzin Yemima Mizrachi please click on the link below. I guarantee it will make your day!